Undertrees Farm B&B, Kent - Review

So 1730hrs came, we (temporarily) left the pub in Stodmarsh town, and wound our way up the pothole-filled country lane, through the unmistakably flat Kent landscape (great for UFO spotting apparently, the sky seems so *huge* compared to hilly Surrey)-

-to the B&B, where another couple were busy unloading suitcases from their car (giving us confidence that the tomtom had led us to precisely the right place, even though we had noted that it was indeed a house, certainly under some trees and definitely in the middle of farm land, which did match the name we had scribbled on our bit of paper)... ;)

Struggling up to the front door dragging our weekend bags, a little surprise occurred, revealing exactly the sort of place we had booked ourselves in to...the front door had been left unlocked (and, actually, remained so for the duration of our visit) and this note was laying on the doormat, inviting us to come in and make ourselves comfortable, which we did...unfortunately it was more like half an hour we were left waiting, rather than the documented "5 minutes", but when our host arrived (a lovely lady called Jane, whom we instantly forgave) she showed us up to our rooms (we got the one at the front of the house) of the two to choose from (the choice was ours, so I dashed into the slightly larger, brighter one and dumped the bags down, feeling all smug with myself)...

...which actually just looked like someones guest room, not a traditional "room in a B&B" at all (well, apart from the kettle in the corner), complete with (absolutely tiny) en-suite (I could barely turn around in the shower, but then I am quite big, I guess) -

- the other thing we noted was that not one of the windows in the whole house had any curtains, just large wooden shutters, and the windows were single glazed, which meant that it did actually get quite cold when the wind started rattling them (must be a nightmare of a place to keep warm), luckily, on the end of the bed was an old fashioned feather eiderdown (we were obviously not the first people in this room to suffer a little with the chill), and snuggled under that the bed got very cosy, very quickly...which was fine...

Breakfast in the morning was an excellent affair, you can choose when you want it (within reason) and opt for either a full English or a continental, it starts with (what certainly tasted like) freshly squeezed orange juice and a selection of warm bread/croissants/hot cross buns with butter and marmalade, cereal, tea or coffee, and then a very fine example of the classic British invention (really good sausage, free range eggs, mushrooms, tomato, bacon etc.)...dunno why, but at home all I can usually face for breakfast is a small yogurt - something just happens to me when I'm away - I somehow seem to be able to eat like a hungry bulldog without ever really feeling like I've had enough, this meant that Archie (the resident Golden Retriever), who begged *extremely* hard for a morsel, even at one point doing the full one-paw-in-the-air-with-head-cocked-to-the-side manoeuvre (which *very* nearly worked), had to resort to plan B - i.e. stealing leftovers from the dishwasher, which he got away with three times during our meal (to noisy scolds, chasing him from the kitchen by his mum)...quite charming... ;)

So, to sum up, it's not miles away from Canterbury (about ten or fifteen minutes in the car, depending on the traffic), near to an absolutely fantastic pub with great food (well within walking distance on a pleasant summer evening - just wish we had been there on a pleasant summer evening), it's a really quiet place (just fields as far as the eye can see) and it's not being run like a business...imagine staying in a functioning family home as the guest of a friend of a friend and you won't be far off the mark, you won't see any signs saying "Private", and you'll feel inclined to kindly thank your host after you have watched her slaving away at the stove to cook your breakfast, which you eat at the family kitchen table (discussing with the other guests and your host what your coming day will consist of)...perhaps not everyones cup of tea, but for us a very enjoyable, and probably almost unique way to get to see this interesting part of the country...and to think, we were considering the travelodge! ;)