Finks Links #71

Time marches inexorably onwards, and another week draws to a close...but fear not, for it is time (therefore) for another collection of the amusing, strange and simply interesting from around the world wide internets!

Let's start this week off with some Lego video game classics...

Very spooky - discover Mexico's Isla De Las Muñecas (or island of the dolls)...

What happens when a 13 year old kid gives up his iPod for a generation 1 Sony Walkman...

Hang on, something's not quite right here...

In case of zombies, break glass...

The first hi-res images of the moon... ;)

Fifteen rather odd "vintage" adverts (although creepy is certainly the word for some of them)...

An Octopus shaped USB hub!

...and finally (but not least-ally) a cringe-worthy record breaking fail and a hilarious wildlife photography fail... ;)

More next week...!

Art Exhibition Canary Wharf - UEL Fine Art Students

Just had to share this...spotted it this morning pasted to one of the windows in reception in One Canada Square...really made me smile - "I'm late! I'm late!"... ;)

Will have to have a proper nose around at lunchtime, there seem to be little works of art peppered all over the place by these fine art students, like another person has stuck lithographic lettering just by our security barrier reading "Just passing by"...

Actually some of the more interesting and amusing pieces to have been exhibited here (IMHO... ;)

Antenatal Class - Signs that labour has begun!

So after another (one of the rather frequent) breaks to "make a brew" that our tutor Fiona was so fond of, the class then turned to the very late stages of pregnancy, and the signs one should look out for - clues that the little bun might be just about ready to pop out...first up was something that never occurred to me, the fact that as the baby runs out of room, so it won't be able to kick out quite as sharply, this coupled with occasional back ache is a sign to keep a closer eye on things...in preparation, snacks should be switched to high energy ones (again the glucose tablets were mentioned), but essentially it's important to stay active and keep on as normal (keep on with going to the shops, going out for lunch etc.), Mum deliberately spending as much time as possible on her feet, posture while sitting now should be comfortable, but always upright (or slightly leaning forward)...if the back pain gets a bit much, take two paracetamol...

The next most likely thing to happen is for the waters to break, although this is by no means a certainty, it was explained that sometimes just a little will emerge, sometimes a lot will emerge, and sometimes (although rarely) the sac will be born intact with the baby and the midwife will need to cut it open herself...so assuming any water discharges at all, the midwife should be called immediately and told what colour the fluid is and a rough estimate of how much there was...at this point you are anything up to 3 days from the start of labour (believe it or not)...!

Along with the waters (possibly) breaking, another thing that *may* happen is what is known as a "Show" (delivery of a mucus-like plug that resembles watered-down strawberry jam), this again doesn't mean labour has started, it's just another indication that things are moving along in the right direction...

Contractions should now follow (sooner or later)...to start with they will feel like alternating back pain and period pain and will be extremely irregular (perhaps hours apart), but gradually, gradually they will arrive more often...during this stage, it is also important to stay mobile (gravity is labours friend), when sitting stay upright (as before), or leaning gently forwards (to help the baby into the correct position for delivery)...good things to do now are take long, warm baths (which will massively reduce the pain of contractions while still allowing them to continue apace) and sitting on a birthing ball (if you have one) or astride a chair (facing the back) with the head resting (if you don't)...

When contractions are perfectly regular, lasting 1 minute, and are happening every 3-4 minutes (and mum can't talk during them), it's time for Dad to throw the bags in the back of the car while Mum calls the midwife...

Next stop is (almost certainly) the hospital... :0

NHS Antenatal Class, East Surrey Hospital

I have to say, I was completely confident that attending NCT classes was the best approach we could take (as prospective parents), I was pretty adamant that the NHS one-day class couldn't possibly offer us anything that we wouldn't already have covered (and covered in more depth)...but I was wrong...and I was very glad I did (in the end) decide to attend (despite resenting the lost weekend time)...

Those four hours on Saturday last (considering we have already spent over 6 hours in NCT classes) actually answered more of my nagging, half-formed questions than all of the NCT sessions put together - although in fairness, we do still have a number of NCT sessions left (during which they may well fully redeem themselves)...I think my point here is that this class (in a nutshell) fully covers the *essentials*...

I'll sum up here the very important things they went through, just as a personal aide-mémoire (if nothing else), but you never know, someone out there might find this useful too... ;)

Facts and figures first of all - East Surrey hospital is a teaching hospital with 100 midwives on their books, in the ordinary labour ward (they told us not to use the term "high risk", as it simply isn't the case) there are 9 beds, each in it's own room with en-suite facilities (bath, toilet etc.) plus a further 6 beds for those needing to be induced (which are just normal rooms)...this area is a normal hospital environment (i.e. 100% clinical, perhaps a bit scary for a first time mum and dad)...next there is the birthing centre where things are rather different - only three rooms this time, but each has a mattress on the floor, birthing mats, large bouncy balls (for sitting on), sofas and even a flat panel TV, lighting is subdued - the whole environment is about as far as you can remove yourself from "ER" or "Casualty"...they also have a birthing pool, calm music is encouraged and lights tend to have dimmer switches...if there are no complications at all (and the rooms are available) then anyone can use this area...the nice thing being, if anything does start to concern the midwives, within 2 minutes you are in a clinical environment with all the tools and staff at hand to deal with any emergencies...it really does have the best of both worlds...

The next thing they took us through was all the (critical) things to pack...

So here, the definitive list of "What to take to hospital" (from a senior Midwife's point of view) -

2 large towels

3 baby vests

3 baby grows

A pot of barrier cream (Sudacrem)

An infinite supply of muslin cloths (you can never have too many)

A selection of cool clothes for mum (suitable for long, refreshing constitionals around the golf course)

A large selection of high energy snacks (up to 6,500 calories (that's 1,500 more than NCT estimates!) can be burnt up during childbirth)

Glucose tablets (same reason, plus quick and easy to imbibe)

Lip balm (the gas, if taken, tends to dry out the mouth)

A baby blanket (not white, or the orderlies might take it down to the dungeons to be washed, never to be seen again)

A full pack of nappies

2 pillows (the hospital is low at the moment - again though , not white pillow cases!)

1 (must be brand new and boxed, or you won't be allowed to plug it in for health and safety reasons) electric desk fan (it is deliberately kept warm on the wards to reduce shock to the newborns, and it's going to be hot anyway)!

...and in a *separate* carrier bag (ready to hand to the midwife when requested) -

1 disposable nappy

1 basic vest

1 basic baby grow (don't bother with a posh one at this stage, by all accounts it will be covered in sick by visiting time, switch to the posh one 2 minutes before the door opens to admit relatives)

1 basic hat

1 basic cardigan

Next up, I'll cover the signs they told us to keep an eye on as the due date approaches, getting to hospital, and what happens during the first stage of pregnancy...but that is for another post (as this one is already quite long enough... ;)

Wimbledon Rain...

So the whole of Wimbledon fortnight (during which I confidently predicted it was going to piss it down) manages to go by with barely a spot of rain, the very *day* after it finishes (as if with deliberate malice), we walk out the front door to a few spits and spots (pausing to pick up the one small umbrella we can find, just in case) by the time we have parked the car in Earlswood the heavens have absolutely torn themselves open (having saved up the full two weeks worth ready to dump upon us all in one go), soaking us both to the skin...even on the platform (the sound deafening as the torrent pounded the corrugated roof) the clunky guttering completely overwhelmed, directing water everywhere except down into the drains...

By the time we got to Redhill (90 seconds later), it was blue skies again...

Watching Andy Murray at Canary Wharf

Watching Andy Murray at Canary Wharf
Originally uploaded by finkangel.

Wow, just one or two people on the green watching proceedings on the big screen then! :0

Finks Links #70

Another week closer to parenthood, and this time, thankfully, there have been just a few minutes to collect some decent links! So, do please enjoy -

Someone has spent the last two years building a reproduction 1851 Tempest Prognosticator (oddly enough in Okehampton) which predicts storms using live fresh water leeches! Looks like I'll be popping along next time I'm in the area!

Check out falseexpense.com...honestly, will the wonders never cease?

Find out how laptop manufacturers get such good battery life when they are performing the benchmarking...(not terribly surprising)!

Carnivorous robots to be introduced into English homes... ;)

Bagel to go...(a very novel use for an empty DVD "cake tin")...

In case of Earthquake... ;)

WWIII propaganda...

A real life Spiderman (check out the flip)!

A nice urban exploration summary piece...

...and finally, an excellent bulletin board win and a hilarious sign fail... ;)

More next week...!

Automatic Tourist Remover!

Wow, this has the potential to save a *lot* of time if you are hunting for that perfect shot (and can't be bothered to wait behind the lens until the view is clear), simply take a selection of shots (using roughly the same angle) and this free web app will work out which bits of the picture have moved (i.e. the annoying tourists) and crop them out using chunks from the other shots you took! Awesome!

Check out the automatic tourist remover...

Commuting in a Heatwave

I do hate commuting in this heat but beyond the absolutely obvious (i.e. carrying a bottle of water), there are a few things that I have discovered to maximise comfort (although admittedly it's never going to be a pleasure)...first off (and I haven't got to this stage yet) commute in shorts, packing your smart trousers to change into later...on Southern trains (probably applies to other train operators too), if you happen to walk into a carriage and the air conditioning is off, don't just sit down, cursing the conductor for his (or her) inattentiveness - try moving carriages - chances are you have just been unlucky and stumbled on one where the system is broken, yesterday this happened to me but when I checked, the aircon was working fine in the carriage next door, my solution (so I still got a seat) was to prop my trusty rucksack in the gap keeping the cool breeze flowing...next, pick up a Metro as early as possible in the journey (London Bridge for me), once you have read it, it doubles up as an excellent fan... ;)

Jubilee line specific hack here, but it may well work on other lines - when queuing for a door, make sure you go for either the front or back of the carriage (never the middle two doors), as the train windows generate a terrific breeze (from the front during acceleration, from the back during braking), either is good (front is slightly better though, as the train usually spends more time accelerating than slowing down)...if you absolutely can't get into either of these positions, take the middle doors but stay as close to them as you can, a gentler (but still welcome) breeze blows through here all the time through the gaps at the side while the train is moving (and of course when the train stops you can poke your head out to gulp a few fresh breaths of fresh air)...however the ultimate Jubilee line hack (which I saved for last) is (of course) not to even use it at all...the Thames Clippers' new Canary Wharf Express from London Bridge takes about the same amount of time as the tube and yesterday I sat outside (by the engines) getting deliciously sprayed with cool water the whole way...

I actually arrived in the office with a smile on my face... ;)

The Devil Child of Redhill >:(

So the other day as I sat my (tired and hot) sorry arse down at Redhill Bus Station (having run from platform 3 at the railway station above, just missing my early bus home), throwing my bag to the ground and then settling into a reasonable impression of a dog that's been in the sun too long...I squinted up at the arrivals board to see how long I would have to (theoretically) wait...it wasn't long, only 7 minutes, so I exhaled heavily, wiped my brow and then pulled my rucksack over with my foot and plunged inside for my book (just to help pass the time) my mind and body starting their settle towards a state of rest...it can't have been one paragraph later that I was interrupted by a harsh whistling sound, over and over again coming from the shelter in the centre of the traffic island...a small boy, perhaps six years old, was stood inside next to a dark haired woman who was doing a very good job of ignoring him (reading a magazine and rolling a cigarette) as he stood inches from her back, alternating blowing the whistle with all his might and then beating her back (as hard as he could) with his free hand...when this didn't elicit any response he took two steps back and threw the whistle at the woman's head...

I'll admit, I was openly gawping at this point (along with most of the other people waiting for buses) - my book forgotten in my hand - as he ran to the shelter window and started banging his hands against it, each one formed up into the correct position (if you will forgive the Americanism) to be flicking her "the bird"...it was at this precise moment that the woman suddenly stood, charging over to where the whistle lay on the floor, stamping on it once, very firmly, the sound of shattering plastic clearly audible, then returned, still avoiding any eye contact with the child, to her magazine...

At once, the child ran out of sight behind the bus station office, hands covering his eyes, noisy wails emerging from his mouth...mother, I was guessing now, didn't even glance up...when the child reappeared, it was to throw both his shoes at her (missing both times, but using such force they bounced out of the shelter and half way across the distance between him and me, tumbling to a halt near the rubbish bin)...more indecent gestures banging the glass followed, until he slumped down on a chair near the first bus stop, pausing only for a second to flick a McDonalds drink carton (half full of water where residual ice had melted) at a girl I later presumed must have been his sister (as she took it completely in her stride, just sticking her tongue out, to his enormous frustration)...shortly after this my bus arrived, and I piled on, leaving him to his tantrum (and them to their nightmare)...

I surprised myself, I was actually extremely angry at him and felt very sad for her...I mean, the mum was hardly doing herself any favours, but something about being in the position I am (with Flyingpops being pregnant) just filled me with rage when I juxtaposed this behaviour into a future where this was happening (after all the tears, laughter, joy, despair, pain, excitement, dreaming and bloody hard work) to a woman who must have gone through similar sorts of emotions and happy preparation as we have done...only to have this ungrateful devil visited upon her...I mean really...what would you do?

Second NCT Class

So last Wednesday night was the second of our NCT classes, this time we were practically the first couple to arrive, still managing (using our amazing powers of judgement) to bag the worst place for Flyingpops to sit (a huge sofa with virtually no back support)...the session kicked off (when everyone had arrived) with the group being split into three groups (I got the kitchen crew, Flyingpops the living room posse and the rest had to huddle in the hall) where we had to modify (with black and red marker pens) a large picture of the outline of a gingerbread person so he (or more probably she) was exhibiting signs of stress...so we duly scribbled on rough approximations of frowns, fists, weights on the shoulders and speech bubbles with "F*** off" all over it earning us the comment "I should be quite concerned at how familiar you all are with the physical signs of stress" from the tutor...

I won the teachers pet award for knowing that all these were due to the "fight or flight response" (largely caused by the hormone Adrenalin) and we were then treated to a little display demonstrating what effect this could have during pregnancy, and it's all sorts of nasty things, but most importantly Oxygen is diverted away from the uterus and baby, Oxytocin is rendered less effective (one of it's key jobs is uterine contraction), and all this works together to basically grind everything to a halt...this is precisely why some women are in and out of hospital like a yo-yo...at home - contractions fine, getting more frequent, everything looking good for delivery in the near future, unfortunately once the mum gets into hospital, if they start to feel stressed then the whole thing shuts down and you have to pick all the bags of snacks, lotions and pads back up and return home until she calms down again...extremely useful in the days when a bear or lion might spring through the entrance to the cave, forcing a quick getaway but rather annoying in this day and age...we concluded that section with five minutes of deep breathing and muscle clenching...

Probably the other most important thing we learned during the rest of the evening (as we went through the three stages of child birth) was that eating and drinking are extremely important - apparently the mother will burn up something like 4000 calories during the process, so it's important to have a good selection of sugary snacks to keep energy levels high, oh and drinking needs to be handled extremely carefully as the bladder will be squashed down to a very tiny size indeed as the space around the cervix is reduced (and sitting on the toilet is an annoyingly comfortable position for giving birth apparently, but not to be encouraged for obvious reasons)...oh and I am also not to take offense if Flyingpops becomes a little insensitive to my ministrations in the latter stages of childbirth, apparently activity in the neocortex is going to practically flat-line, and that section of the brain is the one (that in humans) is responsible for language...interesting stuff!

Finks Links #69

Please insert predictable Bill and Ted reference here (dude)... ;) Anyway, it's Friday *again*, the weeks are just shooting by now...Flyingpops actually finishes working (ready to have the baby) in less than 2 months now! :0 It's been another collossally busy one, so just a few links this week (all good though) -

Discover the giant pyramids of North Dakota (momuments to fear and ignorance)...

Visit the Materials Library at Kings College London (containing the World's most unusual compounds)...

An amusing collection (one or two you will have seen before, but mostly new) of the highs and lows of fatherhood (love the clown one)...

Learn that the Nazis had managed to design the World's first stealth fighter (and it *would* have been invisible to Britain's chain home radar network)...uh oh! :0

...and finally, a concept fail...

Mysterious Cave, Canary Wharf

Popped over to West India Quay yesterday at lunchtime, just to enjoy the glorious sunshine and see what I could see (as there are often things to see around here for a chap with a camera), and (after briefly being groped by a statue-style mime artist to much hilarity from everyone watching), I did actually find something worthy of a picture...from most angles it looks slightly less than impressive -


- certainly not worthy of the little sign next to it -

- claiming "scientists have been baffled" by the sudden appearance...*until* you peer at it through the specially positioned lens at one end -

- my shot (taken with my cameraphone) *almost* manages to do it justice, it's really, really clever... ;)

Not quite as good as the artist's concept art for the project, but still rather impressive... ;)

West Wittering Beach

So just a few pictures from our (fairly short lived) trip to see what the beach at West Wittering was like...

...and actually, it's easy to see what the fuss is all about...you can imagine what it's like in summer, these beach huts all filled with families...

- absolutely miles of beautiful beaches -

- and out in the harbour a constant procession of watercraft -

- it's just a really beautiful place-

- just a shame I couldn't have had more of an explore thanks to the knee, but I certainly got a good idea of what the place was like...we will check out more of it next time we visit... ;)

First NCT Class, Redhill

Last week (on Wednesday) we went along to our first NCT Antenatal class...I really wasn't sure quite what to expect, all I knew was that every single person I had ever spoken to about pregnancy who has had any sort of contact with the NCT recommended it wholeheartedly...so when we found out that Flyingpops was "with issue", it was a bit of a no-brainer but to apply to attend...it costs quite a bit to go along (I think we paid just shy of £200 for the pleasure) so I will admit to having had a certain amount of curiosity as to what we were going to get for our money...as it turns out I was actually extremely impressed...

Our classes were to take place in our tutor's house in Grovehill road in Redhill, starting at the commuter friendly time of 8pm, finishing (just as the yawns start to kick in) at 10pm, every Wednesday (until we know everything there is to know about child birth and aftercare, of course)...when we arrived a number of couples were already there, sitting slightly self-conciously on one of the many sofas, filling out one of the numerous forms attached to clipboards making their way around the room (accompanied by a plastic box containing an assortment of pens) collecting contact details or choice of the (many) drinks on offer one might like at half-time...when everyone had managed to find the place, apart from the elusive "Jenny and Mark" (who were unavoidably on holiday in the West Country, from the sounds of things), the group was split up, each person selecting a different partner than the one they arrived with (not in that sort of way) and this set the scene for the rest of the evening, being mostly small group activities...the first being to introduce your new partner to the group (after talking with them for a few minutes to find out a little about them), it turned out that most people simply signed up in order to meet other people in the same boat (Urm, we're pregnant, what the hell do we do now? Sort of thing), followed by finding out if we had any idea what the NCT does (other than these classes and the aforementioned sales)...it turns out that they are actually extremely active not only in forming little groups of parents (and giving them cups of tea), but also at the highest level at the hospital, working hard to promote parents interests and watchdogging (if that is a word) to make sure that those initiatives that they suggest are followed through with...we then ran through a selection of cutaway anatomical diagrams showing just how small an amount of room for digesting food and breathing there will eventually be inside the mums to be (to a few nervous glances) and handed around actual-size-and weight models (drawing gasps of surprise from the gentlemen in the room) demonstrating exactly how much the females in the room have to moan (and hold their tummies) about...

The final section of the session was a brain storm, boys in the kitchen, girls in the living room, where we all wrote down everything we were worried about (which was an extremely useful and theraputic process), these lists are to form the basis of all our classes to come (which makes me think that these sessions are going to be a largely unique experience depending entirely on the people who come along and precisely what they are concerned about)...the most impressive thing of the whole evening (for me) though was the tutors clear, expert summary of all the different options for the actual birth (which the midwife should have taken Flyingpops through and didn't), and I think it's actually made us change our mind...rather than normal East Surrey Hospital delivery suite, Flyingpops is now quite fancying the birthing centre just across the hall (full of soft objects to lean on, pilates balls and paddling pools)...so it's already been very useful...roll on next Wednesday!

Happy Father's Day

Daddy,

Thank you so much for all your hard work on my nursery. Mummy is so pleased it's finished and she can now sit in there and relax (after sorting and resorting the nappies/babygrows etc etc).

Enjoy the Grand prix today and think, next year fathers day will be very different... I wonder what we'll be doing?!?

Love you lots already and can't wait for a cuddle in September,

MJ xxx

Finks Links #68

Right, here we go, an *attempt* at getting back to normal (this is never going to work with the baby coming along)! ;)

Learn how to turn your old CRT VDU into a fish tank...

A tree growing on a tree...

Enjoy discovering some shockingly violent 1950s coffee commercials (starring early muppets)...

Someone has (honestly) written a twitter client for the C64... :0

"The prairie dogs escaped within 10 minutes of being introduced to their new $500,000 escape-proof habitat"... ;)

Take a (newly shot) tour around Saddam's abandoned palaces (many now repurposed into US miliary uses)...

Mmmmm...Astronaut beer... ;)

Okay, wind turbine blades are fairly large then...!

Why did nobody think of this before???

The Japanese invent a terribly polite umbrella... ;)

...and finally, an excellent fire drill fail and a great attempted murder fail...

More next week...!

Geek Pizza Joke

Oh this is very clever... ;)

If radius=z and thickness=a, then a pizza has the volume pi*z*z*a

Chilis Canary Wharf in Administration!

Disaster! My favourite crappy American eatery has gone into administration and closed it's doors forever! Curse my penchant for places where I can hear myself think! :(

The credit crunch has well and truly done it now! >:(

The Ship Inn, Itchenor

After we had unpacked all our things and enjoyed our delighted nose around the static we popped into East Wittering (only five minutes drive away) to the shops to buy some food and drinks (as that was where we had been told the nearest supermarket lived), and I have to say, the place was absolutely charming, just a hint that we were seconds from the water, a couple of little shops selling buckets and spades (and that sort of thing), the rest of the town being made up of 40 or so bespoke stores (such a rarity in this day and age) from a wonderfully brimming greengrocer -


- to the fantastic pie shop -

- where you can see them busily making the pies you are about to buy (I bought a steak pie and a ready to cook cottage pie for later)...absolutely wonderful...

That first evening, we thought we would go and check out the local village to the site (Flyingpops having spent most of the rest of the day napping while I read in the sunshine)...on our way passing a large group of (no doubt ravenously hungry and desperately thirsty) ramblers on a grim charge, prompting us to put pedal to the metal (suspecting, correctly, that their destination was the same as ours), unfortunately we missed the entrance to the pub on our first try -

- affording us out first taste of Chichester harbour, unfortunately the two minutes it took to comment on how pretty it was, take a quick snap, then turn the car around-

- meant that by the time we had parked the car, the ramblers has beaten us to the bar and were monopolising the staff ordering gallons of real ale and time consuming dinners, so we checked in the restaurant, but were politely informed that there were no tables free and we would have to wait for about 20 minutes (oh well)...so we grabbed a couple of drinks and headed outside to find somewhere to sit, eventually settling on a bench next to a selection of fishing gear dumped outside the public bar (only some of it decorative)...

We didn't have to wait long, which was good as Flyingpops was starting to get a little chilly as the sun started to set, before we were being seated on a little table right by the door...

Dinner was rather good, when we did finally get it, Flyingpops choice was particularly interesting - listed on the menu as "Vegetarian Fish and Chips", it turned out to be chunks of halloumi deep fried (like a cod fillet would be), the fried potato was a little on the "well done" side, but I kind of like that...I went for their (extremely mature) cheese burger, cooked medium rare, which also came with chips, but mine were served up with a very interesting dip called French Ketchup, which tasted a lot like a mixture of ketchup and mustard...jolly nice anyway...after our meal we made our way contentedly back to the static, for a few drinks and a snooze in front of the DVD player...