23 March, 2009

Horley Police Neighbourhood Watch Alert Feb 2009

Found a little sheet of paper posted through the front door late last week which made for rather interesting reading...it was a list of all the reported crimes in the local area that took place during February 2009, distributed for the dual purposes of neighbourly awareness and crime prevention...

Apart from our resident flasher (who managed to expose himself only the once (managing to make the headline in the Surrey Mirror) before being arrested and handed over for psychiatric evaluation after claiming he was a torture victim in his native Sri Lanka)-
Earlswood Flasher on the prowl
-and our resident arsonist (who has been twice as busy as the flasher, appearing to have something against motorbikes, although currently still on Earlswood's "most wanted" list) the *vast* majority of "serious" unsolved crimes in our area seem to be "theft from a vehicle" (there were six), next most common were examples of criminal damage (mostly to vehicles, which one would imagine *usually* go hand-in-hand with the aforementioned theft)...following those were (and I'm struggling now to use the word "crime") incidents like "Kids knocked on door and ran away", "Kids rowdy nuisance behaviour" (yes, a little annoying, but I'm sure I did a little bit of that when I was young, to no lasting harm), kid "threw lemonade on a car", "Kids playing football in road" (Whatever NEXT!  Summon the SWAT team!) and the slightly bewildering "youths changing(sic) sheep in field" (which must be some sort of error, as I can't quite imagine what they may have been managing to change them in to)...dressing them up as lamb?  Turning them into slightly alarmed sheep?  All fairly temporary (well, I hope so anyway)...oh and then (of course), the rather intriguing "inappropriate use of a vehicle in fast food car park" (must have missed that one in Law class) on the Brighton Road (Doughnuts and burn outs?  Dogging?  Using it as a novelty toilet?) - the mind boggles... ;)

Anyway, the sagely advice offered to us (off the back of all this) is simply to stop leaving anything of value in view in your vehicle (which should surely be common sense), then also taking the time to make sure it is securely locked (and all the windows are closed) - do people really need to be told these things?  Anyway, if everyone manages to do these simple things, then I guess the police will have little else to do other than corral feral youths, confiscating their lemonade and footballs and making sure that sheep everywhere are kept just the way they are... ;)

3 comments:

Ys said...

Hahaha! That's great!

What a world your bringing a new child into. You must be terrified about what it's going to be doing to the sheep when it's old enough to walk ;)

Kev Brown said...

What kind of an animal would do that to an innocent motorbike?!?! Congratulations on the pair of you being pregnant. Good luck!

¨°º©[ Fink ]©º°¨ said...

Aw thanks guys! And if it ever exhibits any desire to worry sheep then I will peer over at it with a slightly disgusted expression...or something like that anyway... ;)