10 January, 2006

IF YOU SUSPECT IT, REPORT IT.

If you suspect it, report it.
New terror alert warnings have started to appear on the announcement boards along the Thameslink route, snapped this at the station yesterday while waiting for my train home...it's to coincide with a new campaign for vigilance from the British public, basically keep your eyes open and don't be afraid to report anything that looks even remotely dodgy...

This brings to mind something that happened to me during the last round of London bombings in the early 80's (thanks IRA), each time I seemed to go up to the City (mostly doing IT support cover at the Stock Exchange) there seemed to be another bomb go off...(this was in the days when we still had rubbish bins in major stations where the terrorists could cunningly conceal their explosives (probably while wearing long, tan raincoats, brimmed hats, sunglasses and leather gloves) and then slip quietly away, cackling)...

Anyway, one morning when I wasn't off to London, I was sat, alone, very early in the morning (early shift on the Help Desk where I worked at the time) on a cold bench at Reigate railway station...(for some odd reason I remember that I was listening to a cassette tape album by "The Cult" on my posh Sony Walkman (this was a good few years ago)...it was some minutes until the train was due to come to whisk me to my destination, and glancing around in boredom I happened to notice that there was a parcel wrapped up in brown paper and tied with a bit of brown hairy string sitting under the bench just about a foot from where I was sitting...

I dunno what it was, probably all the attacks in the city still ringing in my ears, but I immediately just thought "OMG! Bomb!"..quite what kind of terrorist would bomb a tiny station like Reigate is another matter, but my mind started to play tricks on me...I was inventing a scenario where a number of terrorist cells worked together to hit hundreds of soft targets simultaneously, like planting small bombs at a high percentage of suburban stations around the UK as the big London stations were being so carefully watched...and once the almost reasonable concept had become lodged, I just couldn't shift it...

So, I stood up, checked the time, decided I had enough to get over to the ticket office (via the urine-washed, pitch black subway) and report it to someone...At this point a member of staff armed with a broom wandered ponderously up the stairs, half-heartedly poking some leaves under the fence into the B&Q car park next door...Ah ha...! I turned my walkman off, stood up, approached him, smiling and said "What would you do if I said the words 'suspicious package' to you?"..."Eh?" he said...I repeated the words "What would you do if I said the words 'suspicious package' to you?" (in a slightly more urgent tone of voice)...and pointed at the brown-paper parcel lurking in the shadow...

He shrugged and walked towards it (with me trailing a few feet behind, peering round him)...and when he got within range (and I couldn't quite believe my eyes when he did this) the guy lashed out with his foot and *booted* the bloody thing with his foot - *HARD*!!!

Now, I'm no counter-terrorism expert, but that certainly wasn't what I had expected as an initial approach to the situation!!

Anyway, as it happens, all turned out to be well...his careful examination of the package had left the brown paper in ribbons and, rather than a deafening detonation, the only result was a number of roofing tiles scattering noisily onto the platform...

"There you go Mate..." he said, "nothing to worry about"...

You may imagine here, if you will, the sound of blood rushing in my ears at a rather accellerated rate, and, although I'm not entirely sure, I think I actually said "Thanks" to him as he returned to his sweeping...

I was probably rather pale and quiet that day at work... ;)

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