Amazing sign spotted...

...on the edge of a London Park!  Can't help but think of a certain episode of Fawlty Towers... ;)

Tiny sign at Tower Bridge...

I spotted this the other day, right down at the bottom just beyond the glass back wall of the lift, really, unless you were looking extremely hard (as I guess I do), there is no way you would ever notice it (addressing no-one in particular) tucked away in the corner with no obvious way to reach it -

- here is a view of the space it points towards (from the lift when at the top) - you can see to get to it would require you to basically tip-toe along the wall at the side of the Thames -

- and a shot from the bottom (it's pointing at two square yards of paving slabs - and a few leaves - positioned behind the metal structure of the lift machinery)...so what is so important?  It's basically saying - if - by a grand demonstration of river-side acrobatics - you have managed to actually get to the sign to read it - that you shouldn't have - these 10 paving slabs are not a public right of way...as if you needed telling...completely pointless!

Funny Office Sign

OMG! The "Speed lane" is out of order! How will I cope with the catastrophic delay of...urm....using the barrier right next door to it? ;)

Almost, but not quite, as bad as this one...(WOAH - that was almost 7 years ago)! 

England Game?

Rather impressive bit of (mis)spelling on display in Dock Street yesterday... ;)

Fortress Wapping - Taxi sign

...a little bit of vanishing history spotted on the corner of the old Wapping Print Works site (now a construction site), a sign that illuminated (in bright red) the message "Taxi Wanted" over The Highway to summon black cabs to reception...I'm guessing from the days before one could simply call and book one...?

DLR - Scary Teeth Doors

Love these signs on the DLR...don't worry, the doors don't really have big scary teeth...certainly makes the odd tourist do a double take though... ;)

Crossrail Canary Wharf - What's going on

Aw, that's nice...Canary Wharf Contractors have put up a series of signs (making me think they must have got sick of all the inane questions) explaining "What's going on"...

...what the final building will look like...

...and the surprisingly noisy process (even from 20 floors up) of "Silent Piling"...

Cringe-worthy office sign

I know, I know...I write a lot, and I am damn sure I make a huge number of mistakes, so it's awfully "people in glass houses" of me...but this sign that has materialised on the office water fountain has so *many* errors in it (not to mention the fact that it doesn't even sit on carpet), it makes me want to go all "school teacher" on it's ass with a red marking pen...

Click it and cringe...reframe(sic) ye not... ;)

Caution - Random Jack in the box cleaning system

Spotted in the toilet on the 1952hrs train out of London Bridge, looks like several vandals have made attempts to peel it off and then suddenly realised what it was and tried to stick it back on again...the sign reads "Caution. This toilet is fitted with a random jack-in-the-box cleaning system.", it's installed on an enormous steel trap door in the wall directly in front of the toilet (meaning if it were true you would have a good chance of losing your head should it decide to "go off")...

Very funny... ;)

Warning sign - East Croydon Station

Spotted on the coffee machine in the snack shop between platforms 5 and 6 at East Croydon station...Perhaps just a *slight* exaggeration... ;)

Mysterious Chalk Drawing - Balfe Street

Spotted this the other day, on the pavement outside one of the houses in Balfe Street...any ideas? The writing says "Artificial"...

Definitely a technical drawing of some kind, but what of, I wonder? It reminds me of the "idiot's guide" animations they do on Scrap Heap Challenge (to explain the mechanical principles to the layman)...

Funny safety notice

Well, office administration where I work, in a move almost worthy of Metro's "No sh*t Sherlock" section, have taped up the above pictured sign at the foot of a flight of stairs on the ground floor of the building. Admittedly it's a quite strangely angled flight of stairs (on one side anyway), but not *hugely* out of the ordinary or anything, just a little abstract...The sign (with a header and footer of striped yellow and black warning tape) advises those that may consider an attempt at the treacherous climb (if in need of a handrail) should preferably use the side that actually has one (it's on the left btw)...

I can't help but wonder what on earth happened to necessitate this...We'll be putting stickers on things saying the likes of "Power cable, may contain dangerous levels of electricity, do not suck" if we aren't careful... ;)

See some previous funny office signs I have spotted here and here... ;)

Office Canteen - Cottag Pie

(It's similar to Gulag Pie, if you were wondering)
Well, perhaps a little cruel to post this picture, but it made me chortle when I saw it, I suppose I should offer them the fact that people in the catering industry really should be employed on the basis of their ability to prepare food, rather than their ability to read and write in the English language, but I'm afraid a certain someone made me rather sour on that point the other day...

Update - Sorry, just had to bang on about this, just how does one muck up spelling "Cottage" when one can perfectly manage "Ratatouille"...?? Confused...

Fink Birthday Eve... ;)

Got the beers in from the shed ready for my birthday meal tomorrow... ;) Had to refrain from actually putting them in the drinks fridge until Flyingpops went upstairs though as Santa seems to have chosen that cupboard to use as a store room... ;)

Oh and quick update on the detox, I fell yesterday and had an ice cold beer watching "The Muppets Christmas Carol"...so I made it, what was that? Almost 9 days...not too shabby... ;) Really ready for the festivities to start now... :)

Oh and another bit of news, off to New York again in February (BRRRR!!!), but more on that when I get details...

Parking suspension, Balfe Street

Spotted this morning (so that worked really well then! The road is still absolutely packed with parked cars... ;)

As well as all the parked cars there were also lots of "Bill Stickers" down there being angry with gesticulating members of the public clutching their valid parking tickets...quite funny to watch, they really should have turned off the ticket machine, or covered it up (or something...! ;)

Refuge Point?

Just recently a lot of new signs have appeared around the office, this is one of them (they can be found on the landing on each floor in one of the stairwells). Now, admittedly I'm guessing here but, in an emergency, what are we supposed to do? Wheel all the non-able bodied people into the stairwell and wish them jolly good luck (while everyone else legs it down the fire escape)?

I think I would have great difficulty with that (both in concept and execution), but if that isn't what the sign is implying, then what does it mean?

It's like something out of Monty Python "Now, Mr Smith, just to get this clear right from the off, obviously being a man in your position, you will understand that, in the event of a fire, you will, I'm afraid, have to be left in the building. Don't look so shocked, it's quite alright, we'll put you on the landing before we go, not much combustable material there, I'm sure you'll be fine. If things start to get a little hot, just wheel yourself to the nearest window, the canal will break your fall... What do you mean you can't swim?"...

Wharfdale Road - Closed

...weather permitting??

What is this, a school fête...? ;)

Balfe Street signs - Grand Theft Bike

What is it with Balfe Street and funny signs? Spotted this one this morning on my way in, it reads "Thinking about or attempting to steal a bike from here? THEN GIVE A GREAT BIG SMILE There are three CCTV cameras watching & recording you" (it's on the fire escape style exit from the "Central Station")...

It's a real problem in this area...more than once I have seen scuffy young chavs (sometimes in small groups) cycling around like predators carefully circling and checking out any bike that is left on display, and that is in broad daylight! Torquay slag had his extremely expensive and carefully locked bike robbed from outside "The Driver" during Friday lunch a while ago...I would suggest tying a dog to your bike to guard it (if you have to bring it to Kings Cross), but they are probably more likely to get stolen than the bike!

Any more of these signs though and I'll have to generate a flickr set for them! ;)

Prostitution in Balfe Street?

Spotted this in Balfe Street this morning, but my instincts tell me that if the police were really to conduct a covert surveillence operation they probably wouldn't put up a sign announcing it...and where is the MET logo? I think it's a pissed off resident...

I have to say though, it must be late at night, I've never noticed anything remotely dodgy happening when I've been walking down there...(at least twice a day)...

Missing Pets...

Spotted in Tesco Metro yesterday morning while I was buying my sandwich for lunch...I dunno what it is with Balfe Street for missing animals, I don't want to suggest that it might be something to do with the fact that the black cabs use it as a rat run from the Caledonian Road back to Kings Cross St Pancras taxi rank... :(