Traditional Swiss Cheese Fondue Recipe

(Scroll down if you are here for the recipe alone ;)

So, perhaps foolishly, we went to finish off the last few bits of Christmas food/drink shopping (£183!!!!!!!), okay, mostly drink, and lots of cheese...got a big bacon joint to cook up too...conditions in Tesco can only be described as "absolute bedlam", a totally chaotic nightmare, I estimate one aisle in three had at least one abandoned trolley clogging it up, tempers were fraying...amazingly though, the shelves were stocked almost as normal, the only thing we couldn't get from our list was a bottle of Malibu (I'll live)...

Went from there into Redhill (still loaded down with the shopping), spotted this (which I hope isn't a portent for tomorrow) in the market-

- then home to cook dinner, decided to have my annual naughty Christmas Swiss Cheese Fondue (all to myself as Flyingpops doesn't like it...what a terrible shame... ;)

Anyway, if you want to enjoy this awesome and very naughty treat (I *do* only have it once a year) you will need the following -

• A clove of garlic (chopped in half down the middle)
• Half a pint from a nice bottle of white wine (fruity Hardy's Chardonnay works a treat)
• A teaspoon of the juice of a lemon
• A tablespoon of Kirsh (Willisauer is ideal, but any clear cherry liqueur will do)
• A teaspoon of cornflour
• 110g/4oz emmental cheese grated (per person)
  
• 110g/4oz gruyère cheese grated (per person)
  
• Half a French stick (per person)

Procedure -

1. Get a non-stick saucepan (or if you have a cast iron fondue bowl, put that on the hob) and rub the garlic half all over the inside, push hard, get plenty of flavour all over the cooking surface
2. Put the cornflour into a glass and pour in the Kirsh, mix well, if it doesn't look like you will be able to easily pour it out then add a splash of tap water, mix again and stand next to the hob
   
3. Pour the half a pint of wine into the saucepan and add the lemon juice then bring quickly to the boil
4. Turn down the heat (a little) and *slowly* add the cheese, stirring *constantly* with a wooden spoon, waiting until each batch is melted before adding more
5. Pour in the Kirsh mixture and stir well (this is when it all comes together!)
6. Pour the whole lot into your Fondue bowl, light it up and sit (on the floor) dipping tiny cubes of French stick into the glorious sweet sticky yum sauce, curling up the trails of cheese so as not to make too much of a mess before popping into your mouth, washing it down with much, much more of the wonderful wine...
7. Fall asleep in front of a Christmas film

King Charles Hotel, Gillingham - Review

So, clutching our wedding invite we set course for Kent early on Saturday evening...we had booked a cabin at the King Charles Hotel (the pictures on their website are hilarious fantasy), Chatham (about 2 minutes from Fort Amhurst, where the reception was to be held), pictured above (in reality), it turned out to be a charming, sympathetic conversion of an old naval military facility, lovingly decorated by local artists and set in a stunning location (as you can see)...the room came complete with authentic capstan full strength aroma (despite booking non-smoking), and the shower was equipped with a handy auto-on feature when running the bath, to really capure that feeling of adventure on the high seas as you wade across the bathroom floor trying to shield your wedding outfit from the forceful spray...

The reception, in contrast, was in the lovely grounds of Fort Amhurst (here is a view of the town from the ramparts)...

...and a view of the festivities from the same location...

- the food was really good, a selection of BBQ'd burgers, kebabs and wraps, veggies well catered for also, then drinks until the sun was well below the horizon and disco action late into the night, a very pleasant affair spent in the company of some genuinely interesting and friendly folk -

In the morning we were woken early by the noisy natives setting up a massive car boot sale right outside our cabin window, so we gave up trying to sleep, got up and went down for breakfast (which was included in the price) -

We asked for one Full English and one vegetarian breakfast, and I think the chef must have been having an off day...the vegetarian breakfast had an enormous block of cheese on the side...how I kept a straight face when the waitress brought it to the table I really cannot say-

So, we took a quick walk around the boot sale (got a DVD), then hopped in the car and Tomtom brought us home...wedding good, hotel bad... ;)